"Still the best coffee in the rocks."
"It's worth a visit every Wednesday for the $12 steak special alone."
"The pizza is so good but the lady on the phone treats you like you've just interrupted a 40 year family reunion to confess you've just had your way with everyones mother."
"Don't eat here. The food is okay but the service is shocking and the owner is an argumentative cunt. I thought it was me until three tables joined me in a united front. Don't go there."
"Taste your coffee before you leave. When they're good, they're good. When they're bad, they're like drinking an ashtray."