"If you are the mayor of this chipotle, ask for Jake, the manager, and show him your foursquare for a deal on your meal! Only valid if he's there!"
"Blueberry bagel toasted for 1.99!"
"really. Don't. Worst experience of my life."
"Download a bootleg and save yourself from the rising cost of movies."
"pay at the pump to avoid creepy truckers"
"Add cheese to the turkey tom"