"This place is rubbish. Don't waste your money here."
"Joaquin is the best waiter here; a consummate professional."
"They have the best eGo mods I've seen!"
"This place is an antiquated dump."
"Air Marshal John from 'Bridesmaids' works here now during the morning shift posing as a guy named 'Brett'."
"Mayors may come and go...but I'll always be the O.G."