"Welcome to Philadelphia, the best East coast city in America!"
"Sometimes you'll find yoshi behind the bathroom curtain with the phillies gnome (they like to watch you pee)"
"Don't bother playing games that give you tickets: they're essentially useless, you need like 15 to get just a piece of candy at the counter. The tootsie roll claw is a better bet."
"The food was awesome but it was a Saturday evening and our server seemed to be not only bartending but waiting tables as well alone. Mgmt, how is this okay? Check took 45 minutes."
"Ask about the special drawingz"
"They now carry sixpoint cans!"