"Great specials on floor-models and even everyday sales! Don't see what you need? Order from one of many catalogs exactly what your heart desires! Fast and reliable!"
"Tuesdays are apparently Gold day, so $3 off the Gold Wash, awesome!"
"Call ahead as they take a very long time. Some things are pricey, others crazy cheap, but will customize anything for you!"
"Wednesday is Ladies Day, $5 off!"
"Rumplemintz Shots, Straight up Chilled Pucker Vodka (Cherry) from dear Jeff the bartender, and steamed veggies with grilled onions. Mmmmm!"