"Don't be a shitbag, order a taco!"
"Make sure to check before you sit, someone likes to piss all over the toilet seats here!"
"Watch out for the old man driving drunk around the lake, he'll run you over if he doesn't run into someone's garage first!"
"Don't buy their tubs unless you want a staff infection!"
"Creme fraiche? Come enjoy culinary creations by master chef K. Belknap!"