"Don't park your car on the disc golf course, assholes."
"Trying to find this place is an adventure. I had to pay a blind Buddhist monk for directions"
"Get your oil changed here. Fast and cheap, always friendly."
"Grammar tip: Do not use "to include" when introducing a list. Use "including," e.g., "The website has many features, including links, animated gifs, and a shopping cart.""
"Ask the bartender for a Whiskey Anderson, and don't be stingy with the tip or your phone numbers."