"Great selection of fabrics."
"The most awesome jazz jam sessions can be found in the basement!"
"Now with digital freedom (free wi-fi)!"
"Hidden inside the Hamburger Meile Shopping Mall on the ground floor."
"Zombie contact lenses, latex scars and fake blood with prices cheaper than on Amazon."
"Expensive, small portions, french fries are thin and taste fishy. Only reason to support this place is because it's a Reeperbahn landmark with all its blinky lights. If it disappeared, I'd miss it."