"This place is cash only. Also, their passionfruit flavored tea is EPIC!!!"
"If you stare at the Obama-Lincoln portrait on the wall for six seconds and recite the words "Bloody Awful" three times fast, preferably in the dark, a you'll have three years of bad luck!"
"If you're getting the flavored tea (not milk tea), say "less sugar" at the counter and they'll use an unsweetened tea base before adding the syrup flavor. And it'll still be very sweet!"
"Don't go into the basement -- it is haunted."
"The veggie dinner special is mind-blowing."
"Don't look the hippies straight in the eye or they may interpret it as a sign of aggression!"