"Not a bar. Actually a waterway."
"10¢/gal Cash Discount on fuel."
"I've seen better bathrooms in Tijuana, Mexico!! I'll take my chances pissing in the woods, tyvm."
"This place has GIGABIT!"
"They no longer take electronics. Still take florescent bulbs."
"Dear management: if it's too difficult to keep the machinery working, perhaps you need to replace the machinery or those responsible for keeping it in good order."