"Wifi is not slow, however considering there are 8 people all using it at once on laptops and phones, it slows down. We're not running a space program here."
"2.50 draft can't be beat. Wings are cheap. (Psst... Look around, if I were you I would put my phone away.) - The mayor."
"As the mayor of this fine establishment, I love the Texan with all my heart. Been a hangout for many a college meal/beer."
"John is the best front desk worker ever."
"If you're in the waiting room and want to listen to music, put headphones on. No one else wants to share with you."