"Try the classic burger & truffle fries. Easily the best I've ever had!"
"Best jerky you will ever have! Try the Old West or Honey Buffalo. Bomb diggity."
"Try an eggnog chai with white coffee shots!!! Delish!!"
"Really great coffee and friendly service! Grab a java on your way to the lake!"
"The bitch in the master bedroom is a whore...and a fiend. I heard animal noises coming from that general area last night. It sounded like a sheep in distress..."