"I've never had a hood experience here service wise, I don't know why I still come here."
"The waitress with the annoying laugh has a sweet camel toe. And she really likes Family Guy."
"Don't punch assholes in the head... Fronz doesn't really like it when you do that."
"It's not called Pembroke pines mall. It's Pembroke LAKES mall. Sorry bud"
"I had to dry off with a hand towel... Also, I like turtles!"