"Insanely good route setting on the lead walls :-)"
"Proper Tea! How marvellous!"
"Some bunterish lick spittal has posted a range of instructions via blackboard signs. Do as I do and ignore them and maybe they'll go away."
"The cakes are so good, they might actually provide conclusive proof that there is a God - and he must surely love us! Don't miss the caramel tiffin - divine!"
"This is an excellent and friendly pub - maggie is lovely!"
"I'm loving the fish cakes!"