"Make sure you do your taxes on time!"
"an option to stretch your welfare check that extra mile... but really? $15.67 on the weekend?"
"They need to get more shades that complete the 'crack whore' look. Too classy here..."
"Come early... It gets a bit crowded..."
"Came for my free birthday drink... apparently they don't offer it at this location. So I won't offer them my future business..."
"remember to light a match after you do your business..."