"The only reason to visit this Taco Bell is that you really want it, and this is the only one a reasonable distance away. They suck. The service is abysmally slow at night drive thru or dining room"
"Every barber here is good, but Master Buju isn't "Master" for no reason. Worth the extra wait and extra time on the cut."
"McDonalds sucks. Good job driving around the corner and making a better choice!"
"The seasonal specials are usually on point."
"Check the Specials board! Mama Flora's likes to throw a tasty curveball at you every now and again."