"Jeff will kick your ass so hard, you'll be able to bounce quarters off of it."
"How is it possible that there are no jump ropes in the entire gym?"
"Get a buzz and a legit manicure for cheap!"
"Okay, who stole the bosu ball? That ain't cool, people, that ain't cool..."
"$4 ANY shot (yes even Don Julio's) with your purchase of beer (not sure if it's just during breakfast)"
"Get the Bali blue moon. I haven't found better coffee beans in the city."