"It's so cold in here, apparently there's no correlation between the heating/cooling system and the weather outside!"
"Too much debauchery for one tip entry!"
"Magic: The Gathering tournaments weekly, Thursdays- Mondays!"
"Knock seven times and whisper the password phrase "phallic kaleidoscope anthropomorphic fermentation" using a Dutch accent to gain entry and a chance to be rewarded with the world's finest high five!"
"Come for the eye candy, stay for the laughs."